Vintage Inspired Smartassery
Our newest brand addition to the Galison family, Brass Monkey, was launched in 2021. Brass Monkey likes to say that they're the line between roadside souvenirs and fine china. Well designed products that just happen to have a sense of humor. Explore more products from Brass Monkey with their signature wit and vintage charm at brassmonkeygoods.com
Finally, a couple of pens that you'll actually care about losing.
These vintage-inspired floaty pens by Brass Monkey feature words that move and change as you interact with them.
They're perfect for showing your co-workers just how talented you are at putting off even the smallest of tasks. Procrastinator? Ha! Try Mastercrastinator. Watch out world, you're raising a bar...just not THE bar, per se.
- Includes two unique vintage-inspired floaty pens.
- Pen 1: Procrastinator (which changes to Mastercrastinator when in use)
- Pen 2: Professional (which changes to Adequatefessional when in use)
- Each pen measures 6" long and .5" in diameter.
- Writes in black ink, via ballpoint tips.
- Artist: Brass Monkey
Galison.com only ships within continental United States. We cannot ship to P.O. boxes. We can only ship economy for FPO/APO/DPO.
Most orders are processed in 4-6 business days and are shipped from our Illinois warehouse via UPS.
Orders are processed and shipped within 4-6 business days of receipt.
The delivery time varies by your location and shipping option. You can see the estimated arrival for your location on our product pages underneath the "add to cart" button (calculated based on UPS Surepost. All free shipping orders ship as economy.
4-6 processing days + 5-8 delivery days = 9-14 business days from order placed to delivery
4-6 processing days + 3-4 delivery days = 7-10 business days from order placed to delivery
4-6 processing days + 1-2 delivery days = 5-8 business days from order placed to delivery
Please note. We are not responsible for any delays caused by UPS. The UPS delivery days above are based on an average, are not guaranteed, and may vary based on your location and special circumstances.
Order Total: $0 - $65.00 | Shipping Cost: $7.99
Order Total: $65.01 - and up | Free Shipping (Not valid for FPO/APO/DPO)
Order Total: $0 - and up | Shipping Cost: $9.99
Order Total: $0 - and up | Shipping Cost: $31.99
We start processing your order as soon as you submit it, so we are unable to cancel, edit, or add products to your order after you complete it.
We do not offer returns. We only offer a refund or exchange if the item is broken. Our policy lasts 30 days. If 30 days have gone by since your purchase, unfortunately, we can’t offer you a refund or exchange.
Please do not send your purchase back unless you have been instructed to do so by our Customer Service Department.
If you are approved for a refund, your refund will be processed and a credit will automatically be applied to your credit card or original method of payment within 2-5 business days.
If you haven’t received a refund yet, please contact your credit card company or bank, it may take some time before your refund is officially posted.
If you’ve done all of this and you still have not received your refund yet, please contact us at firstname.lastname@example.org.